Cos' you've got that one thing - Angel is 6

So we've been watching the little sister's and baby brother's growing up videos quite often recently. Yup, it's mainly due to the boy's love for seeing himself and his jiejies on TV and he gets so fascinated, points to the people he knows and even stands up to dance along too.

Well, the thing is, the big girl has been wondering how come her videos have stopped coming and has been so patiently waiting, and waiting and waiting, when I said that I'm working hard on it. It's true, I have been using up much of my time in the past few months just to go through, edit, select and compile her milestones into this video. One whole year of pictures, videos, experiences and thoughts all summarised into a less than 20-minute clip. It's easy yet tough, you know what I mean?

Better late than never, right? After many nights of sleeping at 4am, I finally finished it for you, my dear. I hope you will still love it like how you always love watching our videos with that smile on your face. Actually, I'm sure you will because you are you. Love you to the moon and back!

******



Dearest Angel,

I know that you've been waiting for this for a long time and I'm sorry that it took me so long! You see, we take so many pictures and videos every week, or is it every day, that it takes me ages to sort them out and put them together. It was easy when I only had you, but now that I have you, meimei and didi and three lists of growing up videos to catch up on, please forgive me for the delay, yeah? I promise I will do them for you by hook or by crook because I know how much you, and I and everyone of us in the family, love watching these videos over and over again.

Remember just before you went to Kindergarten 2, you asked me if you could go to full day school so that you can spend the day with your friends? For a mum who procrastinated about letting her child attend school and has only let her attend at most 3.5 hours of school, that was a huge change for me. On one hand, I was glad that you love school and that you have forged friendships but on the other hand, I just couldn't bear the thought of being separated from you for such a long time each day. Yup, you have an emo mama, and you are just like me too, aren't you? Anyway, I made the hard decision of letting you go and the one good thing that came out of it was that I had more free time for your dear sister and you also gave your pregnant mama more time to rest and relax. Looking back, perhaps it was your way of easing my burden, just like how you always try in your own means to help me, even if I might not be able to sense it right away. So, thank you for that, darling.

Yup, I mentioned the word 'pregnant', right? You know, I think you were most excited when you knew that we were going to have another baby in our family. For some reason, you wanted another baby sister and I hope it was a sign of how much you love Ariel and how you wish to have another girl join our family. Nonetheless, fate decided that you will have a baby brother and you accepted that with grace and ease too. Yes, you are going to have a didi who looks up to you and loves you with his whole heart. Isn't it super exciting that we're going to have an newborn to hold, cuddle and love very soon? You are going to be a big sister, again!

I vividly recall how Papa was the one who would apply anti-stretchmark cream for me when I was carrying you in my tummy. Then when I had meimei, you were the one who did it for me while Papa occasionally chipped in. This time round with didi, you and meimei took up the task and night after night after night, you all did it without fail. Yup, that's how sweet both of you are. I will always remember how both of you spoke to didi from your hearts, how you sang to him, how you assured him of your love for him and how excited you were to count down to the day that you would finally meet him. It's such a joy to have a big family, don't you think so too?

Now that you are going to have not one, but two siblings, I can imagine how happy you are yet how hard it can be to be a role model sister for two younger ones. I just hope you know that you are doing awesome as a big sister and you will be the best sister that they can ever ask for. Yup, I've always known that deep down, even if at times I might chide you or be harsh on you, I've always know how wonderful a child you are. Despite all the bickers or arguments you and meimei might have, the one constant is your unwavering love for each other and how you will go to the end of the world just to protect your sister.

Coming to your milestones, you've achieved a lot this year, haven't you? Let's see. You ran your longest run yet and conquered 1.8km with sheer determination, you went for swimming classes and passed your first swimming test easily, you've also learnt to cycle after a few sessions and I'm so happy that all my backaches paid off! Haha. Remember how I kept chanting "Balance! Balance!", "Steady your bike", "Control it, not let it control you", "Have confidence, you can do it!", "Keep on pedaling, don't give up!", "I'm here right behind you, go on all the way!" and so on. I hope those nagging comments helped you in one way or another. Despite my big tummy, I'm just glad I survived those sessions with you and that you made me feel that all of it paid off when I saw how you had overcome your fears, how you finally held your balance and pedaled away from me. Kudos to you, my dear!

Just so you know, I was so mighty proud of you at your graduation ceremony and if I had shed any tears, they were all tears of joy. Joy from seeing my baby girl blossom into a big girl, from knowing that you had hit one of the biggest milestones as you prepare to go to primary school, from realising how beautiful you looked in your graduation gown and mortarboard, from knowing just how blessed and fortunate I am to be able to have you in my life. 

Things will only get more exciting from here as we embark onto the next phase of your life. You are my first child, so it always feel more special as we celebrate these milestones and unveil what the path in front holds for you. Let's just go one step at a time, not worry so much and enjoy as much as we can every day, okay? I want your childhood to be filled with precious, joyous memories and your happiness, not your academics or achievements, will always be my No.1 priority. I'm feeling just as excited as you are about the coming year, my dear. You'll do fine, I know it, I just do.

Please know that I love you so, so much, and this is one thing that will never, ever change. Happy 6th year, my baby girl.

Love,
Mummy