The Sailor Mum

Living life as a mum overseas is drastically different from raising a child in homeland.

We are somewhat stuck on this ship called motherhood as we brave the rain and tide through the thunderstorms. We have no one to turn to if we don't know how to change a diaper, how to burp a baby, how to deal with midnight crying, how to handle constipation and most importantly how to keep ourselves sane. We can only bite our lips and carry on when we have mastitis, bleeding nipples or a 42°C fever. Yes, we can always phone home, read baby books and research online, but ultimately we are still on our own to figure it all out. Did I mention how hard it is to reach a doctor here and the fact that all their answering machines speak in Swedish only?

The truth is, it ain't easy.

There are times I wish I could take a day off, or even just one afternoon, to simply laze around and forget about my mother duties for a while. But considering I have no other family here except my hubby who works every day and sails out to sea often, I pretty much have no other potential babysitter. No, I'm not going to impose on that kind but frail looking old lady next door or that fine-looking young man with the ferocious dog upstairs.

That said, this learning journey has been filled with much more ups than downs. I get to witness every single one of my baby's milestones since the day she greeted the world. From her first flip, first crawl, first tooth, first word to first steps, I was always there right beside her, cheering her on. I can't tell you how much joy all these have given me, if there's only one word to describe it, it's priceless.

It's no wonder that Angel and I have such a close attachment that it sometimes feels like we are glued and tightly bonded to each other. Honestly, I'm not complaining about that and in fact, I adore that feeling of being loved and being needed.

Unlike the usual day when it's just Angel and me in the house, it has been a crowd in our house recently - she now has grandma, grandpa, uncle, auntie and cousins to play with ever since they all flew half the globe to visit her. You know, initially I was a little petrified that she would cast me aside now that she has new playmates and only remember mummy when she needs milk and needs to sleep.

The thing is, I realised that my worry was uncalled-for. This mummy-daughter bond is more indomitable than I imagined and no one can ever take that away. She still runs to me and kisses me many times a day, she gets protective when other people touches mama's things, she only wants my comfort when she cries, she hugs me like a koala bear when we sleep. Ok, I don't mind being the tree but only if Angel is the bear, get it, jw?

One thing I'm sure of, my girl loves me more than she can say. Considering her 30-word vocabulary, there's not surprising. As for me, well, in the face of my 30,000-word vocabulary (or so I'd like to think), I still love her much, much, much more than I can say.

So, in spite of the many more sleepless nights, innumerable hair-pulling moments and unutterable fatigue coming my way, I am still going to cherish each moment of my journey on this motherhood ship in foreign waters. It's a journey that begets more happiness than anything else, and I'm just more than blessed to be her mum.